dimplelashton:

look at michael, look at how they all stare at him x
hermionemollycharliepond:

just-raowolf:

edenwolfie:

my year 8 students had to do a budgeting activity pretending they were living out of home on $2000 a month and I find this written on there help I can’t fucking breathe

We had to do this and I was partnered with a boy whose parents are a scientist and a doctor. My family spawned the book: Top Drawer Villain - autobiography of a London criminal.
First of all, we had to choose where we would shop. He wanted to buy from Booths. “We are not buying from Booths," I snapped. "Get on Asda’s website right now." His face froze.
“A-Asda?" he whispered. "But that’s where… The Lower Classes shop.”
This was a good start.
We then had to decide on a menu. We started on breakfast. “Toast," he said.
“Toast," I said. "Great. Look, Asda has its own wholemeal—”
“Warburton’s thick-slice white bread. Nothing else. With olive oil.”
“You WHAT?" I choked. "You have olive oil, on your toast, in the morning?”
He frowned. “Who doesn’t?”
“Okay," I said, "but what will the children eat?”
He gaped at me. “The children? We have children?”
We continued. All was well until it came to what we would have on our sandwiches. We even sorted out the children’s lunch - they, of course, would get free school meals. “Yes," he agreed; "if we can’t even afford Bertolli then they can get school meals on the government.”
He asked what dressing we should have on our ham. “Nuh-uh," I said. "Can’t have ham. I’m vegetarian.”
“But I’m not.”
“Yes, but we’re married and we can only afford one sandwich filler so it has to be vege—”
“We’re married!?”
“Of course we’re married! You’re devout Christian - how do you think I convinced you to have children?”
He shook his head, frowning. “Well I want ham. You’ll have to put back the washing powder - I need ham on my sandwiches.”
We continued. Finally, it was dinner. “Okay," he said, clearly thinking hard; "for dinner, we can have… Chicken nuggets and… Beans?”
“Vegetarian.”
“Vegetarian nuggets then. And beans.”
“We need vegetables. The children have to have a balanced diet.”
“You and your children!" he yelled, and the whole class looked around.
“They’re your children too!" I screamed back.
He leapt to his feet, shaking his head and looking distraught. “I don’t believe it - I don’t believe you! I wouldn’t have your children!”
“Please," I cried, standing up also. "Don’t—”
“I want a divorce!”
And he walked out of the classroom.
The teacher stood up and stared between me and the door through which he had vanished. “I’m sorry," I whispered, "but we couldn’t do it any more. There were just too many differences - I can’t live with someone who thinks champagne is a budget.”
I can’t wait to see this guy when he gets to university.

READ THE WHOLE THING

cachaemicgement:

WAIT, I NEED TO FIX THIS.
gif-guy:

Other Funny Gifs http://gif-guy.tumblr.com/
What us an Ashton Irwin? Can u tell me all of your wisdom?
ASKED BY Anonymous

dimplelashton:

ok then seems like it’s ashton’s turn now

WHERE DO I START WITH ASHTON FLETCHER IRWIN?

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well he is the oldest member of 5 seconds of summer (5sos and theyre all pretty cool).

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He’s 20 years old but can giggle like a school girl (let’s just say it’s a talent)

He drums like the professional, talented person he is whilst also singing, now if that isn’t ultimate coordination then I don’t know what is. His smile could light up the world because he is literal sunshine and he cares so much for people that i struggle to understand how anyone can ever be mean to him.

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He is damn good at drumming those drums that sometimes when listening to a song you can’t help but be amazed at how well he can play them

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LIKE LOOK AT HOW HARD OUT HE GOES AS HE PULLS FACES OF CONCENTRATION, JUST WATCHING HIM MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM. he also sings like an angel and every time i recognise his voice in songs, my heart starts to melt and i just wish he sang more. and you think THAT is talent BUT HE CAN PLAY OTHER INSTRUMENTS TOO…one of which is the guitar (just so musically oriented) 

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and when guitar ashton comes out it’s just goodbye to ashton girls (rip)

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he’s also the guy in the band that makes 70% of the videos and enjoys thanking people so much that if you don’t see a personal video update from him in a week at least, the whole fandom starts to panic.  

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and if you were to look up the definition of adorable then you will find his picture right next to it bc THOSE DIMPLES ARE SO DEEP THAT IT CAN CARRY YOUR TEARS IN THEM

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AND HIS HAIR IS JUST SO NICE AND CURLY, I JUST WANT TO TOUCH IT BC IT PROBS FEELS LIKE A SOFT PUPPY

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AND HIS EYES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL THAT I CANT EVEN PUT A COLOUR ON THEM BC IT CHANGES SO MUCH SO LETS JUST CALL IT HAZEL but green and golden brown work too

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tell me you didnt just smile looking at that gif, i told you his smile lights up the world

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*rethinks life choices bc i want to be a block of chocolate* 

HE’S ALSO JUST SUCH A KIND PERSON THAT IT’S A NATURAL INSTINCT TO WANT TO CARE AND PROTECT HIM

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he is also v v funny bc he makes hilarious comments

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especially in twitcams bc i fall in love with ashton all over again from laughing at him and i srsly don’t know how twitcams would roll without ashton bc he just keeps it going and tries to entertain everyone

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i could start talking about his beautifully shaped body but that will make me cry so im just going to say biceps

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and no matter how cute ashton can be HE CAN TOTALLY CHANGE TO THE HOTTEST MALE EVER BC HE IS ROUGH WHEN HE WANTS TO BE

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i could talk forever about how beautiful ashton irwin is inside and out but i need to stop myself bc im already on the floor with a pool of my tears

(lukemichael, calum)

replasy:

unamusedsloth:

"Thank you, you’ve been great."

give em the ol razzle dazzle

criedwolves:

stop using the phrase “both genders”. don’t encourage cisnormative behaviour by erasing everyone outside of the gender binary. destroy the idea that there are only two genders.

(via sprite--wings)